Drowning In Death• Show poetry

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My best friend on ap is -playing-dead- she is an amazing writer and an excellent friend... she just needs to learn how to keep a perminant barbie doll smile on her face (the link for her is allpoetry.com/Poets/-playing-dead- you really should read her stuff... it is amazing!)

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I apparently have a really unique way of writing. I love being original. I love writing mainly to sort out whats going on in my head at that time. Sometimes it will actually make sense to people but most of the time it will be the most confusing stuff you ever read.

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Expanding on the comments below...

I dont tend to read books but for some wierd reason i love writing out song lyrics. I will listen to a song and write out all the lyrics as i go along. Then i will kinda just sit there reading them over and over again trying to make some sense out of them. I spose its because i believe that you only ever scratch the surface of something unless you put in time and effort to make sense of it.

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And of course a little bit about love...

Alot of my stuff is written about someone i was seeing who is now one of my best friends as he was before we started seeing each other. All my friends are a huge part of my life and i used to use my writing as a way to let them know what was going on in my head as i am appauling at just being straight about how i feel and i am amazing at just pushing it to the back of my mind and getting on with things until i break down in a huge mess...

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I've always said i wanted to find someone with the following traights...
I'd like to meet someone who thinks the same way as i do...
Someone who listens to me when i tell them shit about my past and doesnt judge me for it...
Someone who makes me smile even when there's nothing but shit going on in my life...
Someone who takes me places i've never been before...
Someone who teaches me something new about life every single day...
Someone who can put up with me no matter how depressed or hyped up i am...
Someone who accepts me for who i am and doesn't ever want to change me...
Someone who gives me a hug when im least expecting it...
Someone who would do anything to see me smile when i'm upset...
Someone who would do sad things with me like take me for walks along the beach or lie with me in a field and stargaze...
Someone who would look after me when times got rough...
Just basically someone who loves me would be good...

and guess what... I'VE FU.CKING DONE IT! I FOUND SOMEONE WHO'S ACTUALLY PERFECT! and trust me it is the most amazing feeing ever... or at least it was... why does every amazing feeling always come with one that hits you like a cold steel knife in the guts when youre least expecting it...

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I love the following lyrics, if theres 1 song that sums me up, thats it...
Dashboard Confessional - The Places You Have Come To Fear The Most

Buried deep as you can dig inside yourself
And covered with a perfect shell
Such a charming, beautiful exterior
Laced with brilliant smiles and shining eyes
Perfect posture, but you're barely scraping by
But you're barely scraping by

This is one time, this is one time
That you can't fake it hard enough to please everyone
Or anyone at all...or anyone at all
And the grave that you refuse to leave
The refuge that you've built to flee
The places that you've come to fear the most
It's the place that you have come to fear the most

Buried deep as you can dig inside yourself
And hidden in the public eye
Such a stellar monument to loneliness
Laced with brilliant smiles and shining eyes
Perfect make-up, but you're barely scraping by
But you're barely scraping by...

Well this is one time, well this is one time
That you can't fake it hard enough to please everyone
Or anyone at all...or anyone at all
And the grave that you refuse to leave
The refuge that you've built to flee
The places that you've come to fear the most
It's the place that you have come to fear the most

And you can't fake it hard enough to please everyone
Or anyone at all..or anyone at all
And the grave that you refuse to leave
The refuge that you've built to flee
The places that you've come to fear the most
It's the place that you've come to fear the most
It's the place that you have come to fear the most

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All i can say now really is i hope that there is someone who manages to make sense of my writing but if you dont dont worry about it im a hard person to figure out... in fact i dont really think ive even figured myself out...

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xXx much love xXx