..._...|..____________________, ,
....../ `---___________----_____|] = = = D
...../_==o;;;;;;;;_______.:/
.....), ---.(_(__) /
....// (..) ), ----" In with a bullet out with hearts.
...//___//
..//___//
---------------------THE-REAL-ME--- -----------------------
I'm 19 year old Aussie chick from the south of the land down under, (Australia) in the state of Victoria, (Yes Australia has states like the American continent, but they are not classified as countries (eg. USA, Mexico, Canada... ect) and yes Australia is the only continant that is also only one country, its not as complex as Europe and Africa). I'm me and settling into the big bad world. The main reason for my page is for Rp reasons; but also to post the link for the story I am currently writting "Metamorphi".
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Thanks Jay. I was going through my old mesages you sent me when I found these. I hope you dont mind me putting them up.
Luv ya
Did you know that dolphins are so intelligent that within only a few weeks of captivity, they can train Americans to stand at the very edge of the pool and throw them fish.
Man is a peculiar creature. He spends a fortune making his home insect-proof and air conditioned, and then eats in the yard.
Whoever said nothing is impossible,has never tried slamming a revolving door
Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures’?
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car
I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar.
The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.
i wish....that there were more people like you in the world..your loving and kind, gentle but tough, wise but humble..shall i go on?
I Always Will
I loved you then,
And I love you still;
I adore you now,
And I always will.
You Win
It’s crazy, but you’re all I want and need;
You win; I’m yours forever; I concede.
My Perfect Refuge
When life is cold,
I wrap myself in your warmth,
nestled in your love,
my perfect refuge.
My Everything
When all goes wrong, and my life runs amok,
I think of you, and I get unstuck;
In the midst of chaos, you make my heart sing;
You’re my peace, my happiness, my everything.
The reasons I love you
The Smell of your hair
The taste of your kiss
These are the things
That I will always miss
The sound of your voice
The feel of your hand
They affect me in ways
You could never understand
The love in your heart
The peace in your eyes
They make me feel
Like I want to cry
You are a gift
That God gave to me
And I can just feel
That we are meant to be
I'll love you forever
I hope you do to
For it's only a short while
Before we say "I do"
Smiling is infectious, you catch it like the flu.
When someone smiled at me today, I started smiling too.
I passed around a corner and someone saw my grin.
When he smiled I realized I'd passed it onto him.
I thought about that smile, then realized it's worth.
A single smile like mine, could travel round the earth.
So if you feel a smile begin, don't leave it undetected.
Lets start an epidemic quick and get the world infected!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
to every guy...We are a dying breed
To every guy that's said, "Sex CAN wait"
To every guy that's said, "You're beautiful."
To every guy that was never too busy to drive across town to see her.
To every guy that gives flowers and a card when she is sick.
To every guy who has given her flowers just because.
To every guy that said he would die for her.
To every guy that really would.
To every guy that took time to do what she wanted to do.
To every guy that she cried in front of.
To every guy that holds hands with her.
To every guy that kisses her with meaning.
To every guy that hugs her when she's sad.
To every guy that hugs her for no reason at all.
To every guy who would give their jacket up for her.
To every guy that calls to make sure she got home safe.
To every guy that would sit and wait for her for hours
just to see her for ten minutes.
To every guy that would give his seat up.
To every guy that just wants to cuddle.
To every guy that reassured her that she was beautiful
no matter what.
To every guy who told his secrets to her.
To every guy that tried to show how much he cared
through every word and every breath.
To every guy that thought maybe this could be the one.
To every guy that believed in her dreams.
To every guy that would have done anything
so she could achieve them.
To every guy that never laughed at her
when she told him her dreams.
To every guy that walked her to her car.
To every guy that gave his heart.
To every guy who prays that she is happy
even if you are not with her.
...This one bulletin is for you...
Not many girls appreciate nice guys anymore...
And because of this, there are not many left out there...
i guarantee 90% of the men on your page will not repost this cuz they care more about their image
If you are a nice guy repost this with "We're a Dying Breed "
If you are a girl that thinks every guy should treat a girl this way
repost this with: "To Every Guy...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~
*A true hero
A real hero is dirty
His cape encrusted with blood
he is mean and looks evil
But he will do everything to deny he is a hero
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'M SORRY!!!
Im sorry if I don't meet your standards
I'm sorry if I'm not a
I'm sorry if my boobs aren't big enough to "satisfy" your needs.
I'm sorry if I'm not skinny enough for you to see my ribs
I'm sorry if I'm not pretty enough to be "your girl".
I'm sorry if I'm not taned enough for you
I'm sorry if I'm not a playboy model so I can't act like a porn star for you.
I'm sorry if I'm weird
I'm sorry that I write about you every day
I'm sorry if i don't have a dream body that turns you on.
I'm sorry if im not tall enough.
I'm sorry if I don't have sex with you on the first date.
I'm sorry if I'm annoying
I'm sorry if my hair is not long enough.
I'm sorry that im different from those other girls
I'm sorry i won't hang all over you, and be a complete tramp to make you happy.
I'm sorry that I actually care about you
and actually call to see how you're doing.
But most of all...
I'm sorry that most guys can't accept a girl for who they really are.
If you're a girl and you agree with this letter, repost as "I'm sorry".
If you're one of the FEW GUYS with enough balls to repost and you would never make your girl feel this way, repost as "I love you just the way you are"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~
..._...|..____________________, ,
....../ `---___________----_____|] = = = = = D
...../_==o;;;;;;;;_______.:/
.....), ---.(_(__) /
....// (..) ), ----"
...//___//
..//___//
.//___//
If you would jump in front of a bullet for your girlfriend, boyfriend,
ex-girlfriend, ex-boyfriend, best friend, family member, or just a
person you love, post this onto your page
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind
Boy: No
Girl: Do you like me?
Boy: No
Girl: Do you want me?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you live for me?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Boy: No
Girl: Choose— me or your life
Boy: My life
The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...
The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I'm not willing to do anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, IwuvMyKenshyPoo, Heidiplease, iNsOmNiAc BiLlIe JoE lOvEr, Black Panther Warrior,Mina the Mischevious, SnowNeko, KylaMizuki, SkyeEyesSparkle7135, Ms.Misery.SouthernSecrets15. ChristinaXCuriosity, SecretButterfly, XxxSuicidal-lovexxX, Property.of.Jesus, Yourhateful. WhoAmIToday, bleedingheart91, Guardian of Shadows, shadow of the void, Danzy007
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Love is Friendship set on fire!
A real hero is dirty
His cape encrusted with blood
he is mean and looks evil
But he will do everything to deny he is a hero
----------------------------------- ----------------------------
_+880___________________________ ___
_++88___________________________ ___
_++88_________ ROCK ON!!!!!!__________
__+880__________________________ ++_
__+888________________________+8 88_
__++880______________________+88 8__
__++888_____+++88__________+++8_ _
__++8888__+++8880++888___+++88__ _
__+++8888+++8880++8888__++888___ _
___++888++8888+++888888++888____ _
___++88++8888++8888888++888_____ _
___++++++888888888888888888_____ _
____++++++88888888888888888_____ _
____++++++++000888888888888_____ _
_____+++++++000088888888888_____ _
______+++++++00088888888888_____ _
_______+++++++088888888888______ _
_______+++++++088888888888______ _
________+++++++8888888888_______ _
________+++++++0088888888_______ _
my fav. QUOTES:
1. Friends dont let friends drink and take home ugly women.
2. Scientists say one out of every four people is crazy. Check three friends, if they're alright you are it.
3. Last night, I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and thought to myself, "Where the heck is the ceiling?"
4. When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself.
5. This land is your land. This land is my land. So stay on your land.
6. Puritanism: the haunting fear that someone, somewhere may be happy
7. I can see clearly now, the brain is gone...
8. I may not agree with what you say, but I'll fight to the death for your right to die in a fire of suspicious origin
9. If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let 'em go, because, man, they're gone.
10. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
11. The more you complain, the longer god makes you live
12. What part of "Thou Shalt Not...." didn't you understand? -God
13. Lead us not into temptation. Just tell us where it is; we'll find it. - Sam Levenson
14. (fav)Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.-Robin Williams ----------------------------------- ---------------------
....oooO
.....(....). ......... ......
......)../.. ...Oooo.. ..
.....(_/.... .(....).. .....
............ ...)../.. ......
............ ...(_/... .....
............ ......... ......
....oooO.... ......... ..
.....(....). ......... ......
......)../.. ...Oooo.. ..
.....(_/.... .(....).. .....
............ ...)../.. ......
............ ...(_/... .....
............ ......... ......
... I WAS ............ .
.......... HERE ......
92% of the teen population would be dead if 50 Cent said it wasnt cool to breathe anymore.
Copy and paste this into your profile if you are one of the 8% who would be laughing their ass off.
----------------------------
~Rules are like paperclips: meant to keep things together, fun to bend, and easily twisted out of shape.
~When life gives you lemons you SUPPOSED to make lemonade, BUT it's more fun to throw them at people
~LAlalallalALLALalalalLALALALLalala (Life's Greatest Lesson)
~The world does not revolve around me. Its the whole freakin universe that revolves around me.
~DO NOT put the hose of the vacuum cleaner in your mouth. You may think itll be funny. Its not. It hurts. Trust me.
~The harder you try to fit in the more you probably will, BUT you're also selling your soul to the evil aliens that are watching the earth every moment of every day (No, Im not paranoid, its a fact)
~Weird is good!
~There is no 'I' in team; but there is a 'me'.
~Love makes the world go around, but Im pretty sure money has something to do with it too.
~Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Unless, of course, they did unto you first. Now you totally have to open a can of 'unto' on them.
~Anybody whos says you have only yourself to blame just isnt good at blaming other people.
~Popular people have problems too, theyre just better at hiding them or they are really clones...or robots
~Emo's have feelings too. Get it? Emo=Emotional. So be nice! Im nice and I have many emo friends, see the connection?
~I thought I liked this guy once, but I was wrong. He was stupid....What? Was that supposed to go another way?
~LAlalalALalalALAlALALlalalalAlalal aLALaLlalalAlA (What? Its still a good lesson.)
~Paranoia is the key to safety
~Those things you see flying around outside. They are not pegasus'. They are flying donkeys.
~Your supposed to live life. So live it BEFORE you die!
~TURTLES EAT ORANGES TO SAVE THE FROGS FROM THE EVIL ALIENS!!!
~Be nice to people you think may be crazy. Chances are, they are and will hurt you if you call them so.
~SCHOOL WAS ONLY CREATED SO THAT THE GOVERNMENT COULD BRAINWASH THE CHILDREN OF TOMORROW SO THAT THEY COULD MAKE SURE THAT WE ARE WILLING TO BE PLACED IN BREEDING PROGRAMS AFTER THE ALIENS INVADE EARTH.
~Be nice to janitors, they have keys to things.
~Quack Quack = Two Psychiatrist's
~Love yourself because you never know who may come along or when. If you love yourself then you have room to love them as well.
~Dreams do come true, but so do nightmares
~Life is like candy. If you feel like it, you can eat it. If you DONT feel like it...you can still eat it. (It makes since if you think about it)
~(No offense meant) Rap is to Music what Etch-A-Sketch is to Art.
~Never hold off on saying something nice to someone. You may regret not doing it later.
~If you have to prove you love someone, they dont love you back. Its not worth it.
~Love is fleeting, chocolate is forever
~You DO NOT do your own stunts! Why does your T-shirt lie to me?!
~If you have PMS and a gun no one will mess with you. Ever.
~Violence is never the answer. But sometimes its a helpful way to FIND the answer.
~Tomorrow will come soon enough, just focus on today.
~ Friends are like balloons, once you let them go they dont come back. So hold on with both hands.
~There is a difference between genuis and stupidity. Genius has its limits.
~Honest critsism is hard to take from a relative, friend, acquaintance, or stranger
~Question Authority...then run for your life.
~No matter what someone says to hurt you. It doesn't matter. It may seem like it matters but it doesnt. All that matter is what you think about yourself.
~If it looks funny and smells funny DO NOT put it in your mouth. I want to try it first.
~Never be afraid to take a chance...actually, on second thought, dont...I want to win the lottery myself
~He who risks nothing, risks everything.
~Today is the tommorrow you were worring about yesterday.
~DONT make pigeons mad. They have sharp beaks and THEY KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE
~Remember, when someone annoys you, it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown, BUT, it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and slap that mother
up-side the head.
~Never wish you were older, because then you get older and you wish you could be young again.
~Friends are the best thing since sliced bread
~Love is a battlefield. So go into it armed with an Ak 47 and a rocket launcher. Trust me you'll need it.
~If you have even one friend, even if theyre imaginary, then you havent failed.
~Dont give up until youve tried, failed, and tried again
~Try everything once, if you dont like, you dont have to do it again. What can it hurt?
~Duct-tape solves any problems with annoying little siblings.
~Dont wait...Procrastinate now.
~Youre going to die eventually, so eat well and live right until youre like sixty and then just live it up!
~Doors hurt. If they are closed, do not run into them. the same goes for walls.
~If you fall up the stairs a Jackie-chan move can keep you from landing on your face.
~Lids fit the containers THAT FIT THOSE LIDS!
~If you get the chance, love someone with all youre heart. There will never be a feeling like it.
~Exercise hard. Eat right. Die anyway.
~If you cant say something nice, dont say anything at all. unless its about somebody who cant hear you.
~Never be ashamed of your mood swings. I mean, who doesnt love swings?
~ The voices in your head ARE NOT real, but they still come up with some really great ideas.
* If you are an obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
* If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
* If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
* If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want; stay on the line while we trace your call.
* If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transfered to the mother ship.
* If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.
* If you are a manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer.
* If you are dyslexic, press 969696961001
* If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key until a representative comes on the line.
* If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden name.
* If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 000.
* If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep, or before the beep. Or after the beep. Or before the beep. Please wait for the beep.
* If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9.
* If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our operators are far too busy to talk to you.
*I press 3,4,5,and 6* -they traced my call then beamed me to the mother ship- *while on the ship I heard the little voices* and they told "me no one will answer" *I pressed 8 but can't remember what happened**I pressed 9* *I pressed 9* *I pressed 9* *I pressed 9* *But in the end I hung up the people were just to busy* *click*
Aussie National Address.
We, the people of the broad brown land of Oz, wish to be recognised as a free nation of sheilas and blokes. We come from many lands (although a few too many of us come from New Zeland) and, although we live in the best country in the world, we reserve the right to bitch and moan about it whenever we bloodly like.
We are a nation divided into many states. First, there’s Victoria, named after a queen who didn’t believe in lesbians. Victoria is the realm of turtlenecks, café latte, grand final day and big horse races. It’s capital is Melbourne, whose chief marketing pitch is that it’s ‘livable’. At least that’s what they think. The rest of us think it is too bloody cold and wet.
Next there is New South Wales, the realm of pastel shorts, fluffy cappuccino with sugar, thin books read quickly and millions of dancing queens. Its capital Sydney has more queens than any other city in the world and is proud of it. Its mascots are Bondi lifesavers who pull their Speedos up to their cracks to keep the left and right sides of their brains separate.
Down south we have the often forgotten Tasmania, a state based on the notion that the family that bonks together stays together. In Tassie, everyone gets an extra chromosome at conception. Maps of the state bring smiles to the sternest faces – that is, when we remember to tack it on.
South Australia is the state of innovation; where else can you so effectively reuse country bank vaults and barrels as in Snowtown? They had the Grand Prix, but lost it when the views of Adelaide (also named after a queen) sent the Formula One drivers to sleep at the wheel.
Western Australia is too far from anywhere to be relevant in this document. It’s main claim to fame is that it doesn’t have daylight savings because if it did all the men would get erections on the bus on the way to work. WA was the last state to stop importing convicts, and many of them still work there as ‘entrepreneurs’.
The Northern Territory is the red heart of our land. Outback plains, sheep stations the size of Europe, kangaroos, jackaroos, emus, Uluru and dusty kids with big smiles. It also has the highest beer consumption of anywhere on the planet, and its creek beds have the highest aluminium content of anywhere, too. Although the Territory is the centrepiece of our national culture, few of us live there, and the rest prefer to fly over it on our way to Bali.
And there’s Queensland. While any mention of God seems silly in a document defining a nation of half-arsed agnostics, it is worth noting that God probably made Queensland. Why he filled it with dickheads remains a mystery…
Oh yes, and there’s Canberra. The nation’s capital. The least said about that, the better. We, the citizens of Oz, are united by the Pacific Highway, whose treacherous twists and turns kill more of us each year than die by murder.
We are united in our lust for international recognition, so desperate for praise we leap in joy when a gaggle of corrupt IOC officials tells us that Sydney is better than Beijing. We are united by a democracy so flawed that a political party, albeit a redneck gun-toting one, can get a million votes and still not win one seat in Federal Parliament; however, Brain bloody Harradine can get 24,000 votes and run the whole country.
Not that we are whingering, we leave that t our Pommy immigrants. We want to make: ‘No worries, mate,’ our national prase; ‘she’ll be right, mate,’ out national attitude; and ‘Waltzing Matilda’ out national anthem (So what if its about a sheep-stealing crim who tops himself).
We love sport so much, out newsreaders can read the death toll from a sailing race and still tell us who’s winning in the same breath. And we’re the best in the worlds at all sports that count, like cricket, netball, rugby, AFL, roo-shooting, two-up and horseracing.
We also have the biggest rock, the tastiest pies, and the worst-dressed Olympians in the known universe. We don’t know much about art, but we know we hate the bloody poofs who make it.
We shoot, we vote. We are girt by sea and pissed by lunchtime. And even though we might seem a racist, closed-minded, sports-obsessed little people, at least we’re better than those f***ing Kiwis!
Some handy facts about Australians…
1. The bigger the hat the smaller the farm.
2. The shorter the nickname, the more popular you are.
3. There is no Australian event that cannot be improved with a sausage sizzle.
4. If the guy next to you is swearing like a wharfie he’s probably a media billionaire. Or, on the other hand, he may be a wharfie.
5. There is no food that cannot be improved by the application of tomato sauce.
6. On the beach, all Australians hide their keys and wallet by placing them inside their shoes. No thief has ever worked this out.
7. Industrial design knows of no article more useful than the plastic milk-crate.
8. All of our best heroes are losers or murderers.
9. The alpha male of any group is he who takes the barbeque tongs from the hands of the host and blithely begins turning the snags.
10. It’s not summer until the steering wheel is too hot to hold.
11. A thong is not a scanty piece of underwear, as in America, but a fine example of Australian footwear. A group of sheilas wearing black rubber thongs may not be as exciting as you had hoped.
12. It is proper to refer to your best mate as ‘a total bastard’.
13. Historians believe the wide spread use of the word ‘mate’ can be traced to the harsh conditions on the Australian frontier in the 1890s, and the development of a code of ‘mateship’. Alternatively, Australians may just be really hopeless with remembering people’s names.
14. If you can’t stomach a good slathering of vegemite on toast, you’re just not true blue.
15. If it can’t be fixed with panty hose and fencing wire, it’s not worth fixing.
16. The most popular and widely praised family on any street is the one that has the biggest swimming pool.
17. It’s considered better to b down on your luck than up yourself.
18. The phrase ‘We’ve got a great life style’ means everyone in the family drinks too much.
19. If invited to a party, you should take cheap red wine and then spend all night drinking the host’s beer. (Don’t worry; he’ll have catered for it.)
20. If there is any sort of free event or party within 100 kilometres, you’d be a mug not to go.
21. The phrase ‘a simple picnic’ is not known. You should take everything in your fridge and kitchen cupboards. If you don’t need to make three trips to your car, you’re not trying!
22. Unless you’re ethnic, you are not permitted to sit down in your front yard, or on your front porch. Pottering about, gardening or leaning on the fence is acceptable. Just don’t sit; that’s what back yards are for.
23. On picnics the esky is always too small; creating a food-versus-grog battle that can only ever be resolved by leaving the salad at home.
24. When on a country holiday, the neon sign advertising the motels pool will always be larger than the pool itself.
25. The men are tough, but the women are tougher.
26. One of the truest Australian experiences is burning your feet on asphalt as you run to the milk bar on a hot summer’s day to get some ciggies.
27. The chief test of manhood is one’s ability to install a beach umbrella in high winds.
28. Australians love new technology. Years after their introduction, most conversations on mobile phones are principally about the fact that the call is ‘being made on my mobile’
29. There comes a time in every Australian’s life when he/ she realises that Aerogard is worse than the flies.
30. And finally, don’t let the tourist books fool you. No one says ‘cobber’ to any one… EVER!
Bushwhacker Etiquette
- Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles, even if the gun is loaded and the roos are in sight.
- When approaching a stop sign, the vehicle with the bigger bull-bar always has right of way.
- Never tow another ute using panty hose and sticky tape.
- Unlike clothes and shoes, a toothbrush should never be a hand-me-down item.
- Do not lay rubber while travelling in a funeral procession.
- If you have to vacuum the bed, it’s time to change the sheets.
- While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this job should be done in private using one’s own ute keys.
- Plucking unwanted nose hair is time-consuming work. A cigarette lighter and tolerance for pain can accomplish the same goal and save hours.
- A centre-piece for the table should never be prepared by a taxidermist.
- Do not allow the dog to eat at the table – no matter how good his manners are.
- If your dog falls in love with a guests leg, have the decency to leave them alone for a few minutes.
- When talking to sheilas, be aggressive. Let her know you are interested: ‘I’ve been wanting to go out with you since I read that stuff on the men’s dunny wall two years ago!’ is a good opening line. (If you wanna be nicknames ‘torso boy’ sure, go for it!)
- If a sheila’s name does not appear regularly on a dunny wall, odds are good that the date will end in frustration.
- When at the movies, refrain from talking to characters on the screen.
- Cattle is usually a poor choice for a wedding gift.
- It’s not ok for the groom to bring a girlfriend to his wedding.
- When dancing, never remove your jocks, no matter how hot it is.
- A bridal veil made of flyscreen is not only cost effective, but also a proven insect deterrent. For the groom, at least rent a tux. Though uncomfortable, choose socks and shoes over thongs for this special occasion.
- Always identify people in your yard BEFORE shooting at them
~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~ !~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~
The poems linked here are some that have really inspired me, or ones from my mates that I absolutely recomend reading!