Barry Hodges• Show poetry

              

 

Firstly, Barry Hodges is my real name as I don't agree with hiding being silly fake names. But you have to be careful on the internet so I understand why some people do that. I am British and very proud of it and I hate people who knock Britain or any other country as we should be proud of our national identities. To be more specific I am English, from Newcastle-upon-Tyne, so I am a Geordie.

I served in the British Army for nearly twenty years and rose to be a Sergeant-Major. I liked the Army life and think that all young men should be obliged to do National Service as it will make a man of them and it teaches them a bit about brutality. I made some great friends in the Army and was sorry I had to leave but I got injured. No, it was not something heroic on active service, it was a silly accident. It is ironic that I saw action in Northern Ireland and in the Falklands and then I have an accident on the base in Britain and get invalided out! After leaving the Army I opened a greengrocer's shop in Gosforth but I am now retired.

I am definitely a Conservative with a capital C. Some stupid people have called me a fascist and even a Nazi (until I gave them a good old English black eye) because I believe in Britain for the British and because I don't want a load of illegal immigrants flooding in. If people come to this country to make a better life for themselves I do not mind, but they have to work hard, and maybe do the jobs the British don't want to do (or are too thick to do), but they have to learn English, they have to fit in with our way of life and not wear turbans or veils or dress like freaks or vote Labour either.

I don't see why Arab women can't show their faces. Some of them are quite good looking and I like a pretty face on a woman. My late wife was very good looking - in fact too good looking as I found out with other men running after her, and one or two caught up with her, which I took a very dim view of. I dealt with the situation quite violently and they ran off like scared rabbits to skulk in their flea-infested hovels. I am NOT racist as some of my best friends in the Army were blacks and a braver bunch of men I never met, they were totally fearless. You would not believe some of the things I have seen black soldiers do; there's a few Argentinian widows about the place who can testify to that!

Because of some of the things I saw in the Army I do not believe in God, although I used to. There can't be a God if He allows things like that to happen, especially the bits with machetes. But I don't disrespect people who do believe as Christianity teaches a lot of good things about honesty and crime and savage punishment. But it is still drivel.

Although I am a working class man I had a good education and I do not approve of people who write bad English. It is the best language in the world and you should be proud of it. I hate people who use "internet" slang and who think that is clever, so if you send me any messages, write in decent English please, or else you will be sorry when I tell you off. In my day, boys had to sit an exam at age 11 (the 11+) and the clever ones went to a good grammar school and the thick and gormless ones went to a secondary school where you wouldn't learn much but at least there was a bit of strict discipline. I strongly approve of corporal punishment, especially for these junkie hoodies and muggers. A bloody good flogging would teach them a lesson and I'd be happy enough to dole one out. In fact I have done just that occasionally. And I'm not ashamed to admit it.

In my opinion, Maggie Thatcher was the best Prime Minister the UK has ever had, even though she was a woman, she was a damn sight better than most men. She taught the filthy communists in the trade unions a lesson and now the trade unions are up sh*t creek without a paddle and a jolly good job too! I have no time for Tony Blair, Gordon Brown and their champagne socialists, they have brought Britain down to the level of a poodle to the Americans. Although I naturally support our troops in Afganistan and Iraq, they ought not to be there fighting for the American oilmen's financial interests in the first place. Hundreds of decent men are being killed for American oil supplies! And Britain isn't getting a fair share of the spoils either.

I am in favour of capital punishment for murderers, rapists and paedophiles (and I'd reserve a nasty form of it for the latter, something with boiling oil in it!). But you need to be sure the criminals are guilty as it would be terrible to hang an innocent man (or woman). It was only because a couple of innocent people got hanged that the abolitionists got their way. British justice is the best in the world but you have to be really sure of someone's guilt before you top him (or her - women can be hanged too, I approve of that, I'd pull the rope if asked). I would even have public executions if necessary as it would teach criminals a lesson and would be profitable too. And savage public floggings for yobs, instead of stupid Asbos which just provide jobs for Social Workers who live off the rest of us.

So I'm a straightforward sort of chap and I will take no disrespect or cheek or insubordination from people, although I am willing to have a good argument and discussion with someone who doesn't agree with me as long as they are respectful and polite. So please remember that if you contact me! If not, don't bother.

You will probably wonder why an ex-Sergeant-Major is writing poetry! Well, I liked English at school and liked poetry specially. Although it is nearly 50 years ago now, I remember that a couple of lads pulled my leg because I was always spouting poetry but they soon found out it was a bad idea to call me a pansy because of it when I smashed them in the face with a brick! I nearly got the sack from school on account of that!

Most of my poetry is about nature and the beauty of the countryside but sometimes I get bitter and write sad poems about things which have affected me personally, and I have a great sequence of poems about how most of my family have died in agony. I also sometimes write what I think are quite funny poems.  I have unfortunately been in hospital for a couple of months, but I am back in circulation now and shall start posting up some of the many poems I wrote in hospital, including some sexy ones.

 

              

OH YES, AND IF YOU THINK ANY OF THAT IS TRUE YOU MUST BE TOTALLY AND UTTERLY THICK . ~~~~~~~~ IT'S JUST A PACK OF POMPOUS DRIVEL! ~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~ HO HO HO HO HO HO !!!! ~~~~~~~~~~ . HOPE YOU LIKED IT !!!! . Not that I care a fart. . AND SO: UP YOURS, THICKIES!